There was no 'happy' about it

I lost 13 co-workers and colleagues yesterday in what started out as a regular day at work.

We came in, listened to the same droll jokes during our annual safety training and then returned to the newsroom. Less than five minutes at my desk and the first co-worker left. An hour later I heard the names of three more.

The day continued that way until shortly after 5 p.m., when a call on my cell phone delivered the final name.

We knew it was coming, of course. The economy has been declining daily for months, and the newspaper industry has been going down with it. Some newspapers are closing, others are cutting home delivery dates. Many -- many -- are cutting staff. We had been warned that our time was nearing.

Knowing it was coming, however, doesn't make it any easier. And I knew the day would be horrid -- either I would be out of a job or I would lose several of my co-workers. It would not be a good day.

And it wasn't.

One colleague was overheard saying that those of us remaining "should be happy that we still have jobs."

I'm grateful. Relieved. But watching as people I have worked with, people I care about, lost their jobs was one of the hardest things I've had to do. There was precious little to be happy about.